Legend of the week

Greatest news story since the one about the man who accidentally swallowed a chopstick

Last week a 61 year old farmer called Alderman Alan Graham, one of the greatest legends of our time, told Rihanna to reconcider her outfit. Basically her latest music video film shoot was interupted by a farmer...

You have to hear this interview... He's Irish:
Great Interview

Here are some of the quotes about the story that are floating around the news:

-Alderman Alan Graham, who owns the corn farm on which the shoot was taking place, said he was on his tractor working elsewhere on his farm in Bangor when he spotted the Barbadian singer’s attire – and demanded that the “inappropriate” clothes be replaced -

"I thought it was inappropriate. I requested them to stop and they did,"

"I didn't know who was coming. If the name 'Rihanna' had been mentioned, well, no disrespect but it wouldn't have meant anything..." "Even if I had known, I’m afraid I’m a little bit illiterate regarding these issues”.

"From my point of view, it was my land, I have an ethos and I felt it was inappropriate."

"I had my conversation with Rihanna and I hope she understands where I'm coming from. We shook hands,"

"Perhaps they could acquaint themselves with a greater God,"


This man wins the Legend of the Week award, a great honour, what a biscuit!


BBC

Failure to launch

Click here to read full story

Italian parents turn to law to evict adult son:

An Italian couple have sought legal help to persuade their 41-year-old son to fly the nest, Italian media reported. The Venetian parents, who have not been named, say their son has a job but refuses to leave home and wants his clothes washed and his meals prepared. They have sought help from lawyers at the consumer association Adico.

Lawyer Andrea Camp said a letter was sent to the son, advising him to leave home in six days or face legal action. If he refuses, lawyers will ask a court in Venice to issue a protection order for the elderly parents against their son.

"We cannot do it any more," the father was quoted as saying.

"He demands that his clothes be washed and ironed and his meals prepared. He really has no intention of leaving."

Firstly, that's hilarious...

Top 10 suggestions to these parents

1. Change the locks
2. Steal his things
3. Hide the TV remote
4. Relocate
5. Remove his curtains
6. Cancel the broadband
7. Smoke him out
8. Creatively use a spider monkey
9. Rent the house out to Australians
10. Buy him a yacht

But really how hard can it be... Court order... Good grief

Friday people

Its Friday!

I have always wanted a yacht, it's my dream to spend much of my life on the ocean, perhaps sailing between Cape Town and Mozambique, taking foreigners along and teaching them to surf, scuba and hit biodegradable golf balls into the sea... It's basically the dream... However, it seems a little far off at the moment and thus I present my new investment (it's a book). Get excited! It's basically like paper airplanes but on water, genius!

These are the kind of things I think of on a Friday,
Man I love Fridays
Have a good Friday

Rich

Hello there

Hello from London town!! The sun is shining, the boks won the rugby (not the best performance but hey, a win is a win) and I just found a pizza in the back of the freezer that I had completely forgotten about, all the markings of a great day! Hope you have a great one too :)

Kind regards

Richard

What to do in London when things go wrong and you need a surf

To some, surfing looks like activity or hobby loved by teenagers who wear hoodies and say “stoked” and "fully", have no real ambition in life and therefore could care less about sharks... fair call, there are some of those. To those outsiders though, there is no real substance associated with the subculture, which is therefore, in their minds at least neglected to the thrill seekers and lunatics.   

On the opposite side of the spectrum, there are the young at heart who recognise surfing as a “lifestyle” or “way of life”, to them I say right on, but they don’t help the stereotype, to these guys the world is one with their souls when they float along and ride the salty vibrations. Once upon a time, perhaps a teenage Devilears may have been guilty of this kind of thinking, unfortunately I reckon the barrier to entry in vocab and etiquette is higher than cost of equipment, stopping loads of people who would be keen to start out, but don’t really care for the whole philosophy. 

I see a meeting of worlds is necessary, SO we need a solution for the normal person, intrigued by the sport/lifestyle/whatever, that wants to build some enthusiasm and get excited for the water...

So as a side note, what is a South African who is dying for a surf doing in London? And more importantly, how is he surviving with over a month since his last taste of salt water?

The answer is Amazon.com and perhaps less surprising, stair surfing

Over the last 4 weeks I have sunken some of my pounds into my sanity, (which I think is a fair investment) into the following:

Sunny Garcia’s Surf - Shocking, but hey, it is 10 years old

Kelly Slater’s Surfer Pro – Brilliant, like dude

Tarzan Untamed – Hasn’t arrived yet, but I have high hopes

Rise of the Silver Surfer - Could perhaps have more surfing in it

Surfs Up (the game) - Hours of surfing fun! Highly recommended

Stair surfing is entirely different... pictures will follow shortly, at present I’m resting my ankle from a small collision with a wall and then a door and then a brief roll down some stairs and then a bicycle, hazards that are generally not associated with regular surfing

So what am I saying, that in some way actual surfing can be substituted by a few tv games... NO... get in the water people... but if you want to have a laugh and get super excited about waves and salt but are scared of surfers, try one of these, I reckon the Penguin one will sort you out, and then GET IN THE WATER,!